My 4-year-old Grandson has Questions about His Recent Marriage

When you live a crazy life, you should expect crazy things to happen.  When you keep doing the same thing over and over and expect different results, you are the crazy one.  I constantly look to the future when life will get easier, slow down a bit and then laugh out loud when I realize that may never happen.

To explain:  I have a lot of jobs, often wearing three or four hats at the same time on any given day.  This is normal for a Type A personality who is a perfectionist and believes that relaxing or sleeping is a complete waste of time.  Don't give me any lectures -- I've heard them all.  Most important thing:  I am NOT complaining. I love being busy.  

Consequently, the thought of doing this month's Fly on the Wall post seemed a bit overwhelming because so much happened in the past two months and it would be a really
l o n g post to share it all.  

View from my room

One highlight I will share with you is that I attended the Advanced Writers and Speakers Conference in Cincinnati and look forward to going back next year.  I learned so much in the workshops, made some incredible connections, made, even more, friends and got to see what it is like to live in 97-degree heat with high humidity.  

Our days were filled from early morning to late evening without time to shop or have any 'me' time -- loved it.  I certainly was not bored for one second.

I left the hotel each day to get to the closest restaurant - that was enough heat to last me until next year.  How do people live, work or BREATHE in that?

Sooooooooo........rather than bore you with all the incredible things that happened the last two months, I decided to do some snippets of the grandkids and their antics.

4-year-old grandson gets married

Sure-fire Way To Handle Discouragement

Do you ever get discouraged?  The definition of discouragement is 1) the act of making something less likely to happen or of making people less likely to do something 2)  a feeling of having lost hope or confidence

Find someone to make you smile

If that is the definition of discouragement, then what is the definition of encouragement?  It is 1) the act of making something more appealing or more likely to happen 2) something that makes someone more determined, hopeful, or confident

The interesting thing about the definition of both words is that discouragement and encouragement are an act that WE do.  It is not done TO us.  We perform the act.  We choose to be discouraged in a situation or encouraged by it and make the decision to change it.

In our darkest times, we need to find something or someone who we know will make us smile. It helps change our perspective and view the situation rationally.

When a Day at the Zoo Turns into a Horror Show

It started as a great idea.  I had no clue that my great idea would backfire and affect me for months - not in a positive way!

When I was a little girl, a highlight of my summer was a trip to the Detroit Zoo.  In later years my opinion of zoos did change as it began to bother me to see the animals caged rather than running free.  I realize that many of the animals in zoos are born in captivity and some have been rescued and given a new lease on life.

I certainly am not one who will rant and rave about this issue. I merely understand both sides.  But, I will probably never visit a zoo.  Ever.  Again.  I do realize that zoos have improved over the years and cages have been replaced with enclosed areas where the animals can roam freely but it still does not come close to what it should be and that is disturbing.

My husband and I have rescued over 30 dogs which made this subject close to my heart. 

Our children and grandchildren have grown up in rural areas so it was not unusual to see a bear wandering down the street and at times, arriving on your deck looking for garbage.

I heard about a "Game Farm" within three hours driving distance and imagined it would be a real treat for our grandchildren to see wild animals in their "natural" habitat.   The date was set.  It would be an adventure.  We loaded up three cars with everything we could possibly need.  Our lunch, umbrellas, granola bars for snacking on, sunscreen, bottled water, and some Frisbees to play with after lunch.

We were excited - young and old. 

Do You Want To Know A Secret?

Do you have secrets that you plan to take to the grave?  Are there things in your past that you want to bury and hope no one ever finds out about them?

Everyone has secrets. My mother-in-law had an undisclosed recipe for Rum Balls that she swore she would take with her when she died. And that she did.  No one ever figured out her secret ingredient.  But what good did it do for her not to share it so we could continue to enjoy her wonderful dessert?

There are secrets we hide, never discuss, and hope no one ever finds out.  We keep secrets to protect those we love or to prevent people from thinking less of us.

3 Life Lessons You'll Never Forget

Biting my tongue, I tried not to cry. The man on the other end of the telephone was breathing heavily and sporadically. When the seconds between each breath lasted too long, terror ran through my veins.

I needed more time. I needed him to breathe normally. I needed HIM. But the time had come. It was his time to leave.

I could tell by his breathing pattern how my words were affecting him. When the breaths came rapidly, I knew he was becoming emotional. When they were slower, it meant he was calmer.

I told him how much I loved him; how much I appreciated my heritage and the ethics he instilled in me. I thanked him for putting up with my incessant babbling when I got excited.  I reminded him how he would offer me 25 cents to be quiet for five minutes when I was a little girl. I felt him smile inside.

I'm the little one

Hilarious labels we see everyday

Are you a label reader?  If you are, then I am sure you have come across some labels that give your head a shake.  There are labeling laws which are in place to protect the consumer. However, when you read some of these actual labels, it makes you wonder if the industry thinks the human race is stupid, or worse.   On the bottom of McCain's Tiramisu dessert:  "Do NOT turn upside down."  UHhh, a bit late! On Planter's peanuts:  "WARNING:  may contain nuts" I was hoping for nutless peanuts!

If Insurance is a Joke, How Come I'm Not Laughing?

When we opened our jewelry stores ten years ago, it was an exciting time.  We opened a store in three different communities that did not have a one-stop jewelry store.  We are unique in that we make all our own high-end jewelry, have a gemologist/designer/goldsmith on staff (my husband) which means we can meet all jewelry needs from repair to making a custom piece to appraising items for insurance purposes.  We also buy gold and silver from people who need to sell their old gold for cash or turn it into a designer piece for themselves.

During our first year, each store was burglarized at least one time.  It was devastating.  If you know anything about insurance companies, they will rarely reinsure you the second time you have a claim. You are put on a "list" and no one in the industry will reinsure you.  There is no way around it and that noose is always around your neck making you wonder if staying in business is worth the risk.

When an arsonist high on drugs set fire to our business a couple years earlier, the insurance company paid out a few thousand dollars against our claim of $300,000.  You ask why?  Because they can.  And we were put on the "List."  No insurance.  Ever. Again.  The loss was both business and personal and all these years later, still saddens me at the precious items we lost.


The first time we were robbed in our main store (the one I work at) our daughter-in-law was the store manager. At the end of the day, the trays of rings and baubles are placed into the safe and displayed in the showcases in the morning.  DIL was putting the jewelry out for the day when two women came in to browse.  She forgot to leave the doors locked until the jewelry was put into the showcases.

Thieves often travel in twos.  One will keep you occupied while the other robs you blind.  This time was no exception.  DIL had the tray of diamond rings out and glanced away for a moment.  The two women left the store along with a couple handfuls of rings to the tune of tens of thousands of dollars.

DIL was terrified she would lose her job or worse.  We assured her that accidents happen and tried to calm her. We tried not to show how despondent we were.  Now.......here is where it gets humorous - if you can find humor in this kind of situation.

Hold on .....now, you can laugh

The afternoon of the day two women robbed us they came BACK INTO the store, sat down at the desk and asked if we buy gold. DIL quickly realized what was happening. She looked at the first item which was one of our bracelets and told them she would buy it for $150 (a fraction of the value). They accepted it eagerly and as she suspected, the thieves then gave her several rings -- with OUR TAGS STILL ON THEM.  She grabbed the jewelry and had a few choice words for them.

They ran out of the store and apparently took the rest of the jewelry to the pawn shop in the next town.

The police were called.  The report filed.  The street people came in droves to tell us WHO took our stuff and where it ended up -at a pawn shop/fence in the big city.  I called them.  Yes, they had our goods but it could only be released to the police.  The police were called.  MANY times.  The police knew they only had 30 days to retrieve the goods from the pawn shop.  After that, the pawn shops are not obligated to keep stolen goods and they can be resold.  Each time we called the cops we were assured they were on top of it.  After 45 days, they finally made it to the pawn shop.  Our goods were gone.  "Sorry," they told us.

Because the girl was under age, she got a slap on the wrist and got away with grand theft to the tune of over $50K.

Fast Forward

We are located on the main street in our town,  As in most towns, there are many down and outers who stop in -- to chat, to sell the odd piece of jewelry or to dream of what they would like to buy or have custom made if their ship ever comes in.  

My husband has a heart of gold and gives them more than what their items are worth and will loan them money when they need it -- I KNOW, I KNOW.  But.......it is our new form of insurance.  We hadn't planned it that way -- it just happened.

They look out for us.  They report to us.  They tell everybody about us. They bring in their friends and relatives who can afford to buy from us.  

A few weeks ago, three different people told us that there was a young woman (the SAME one from years ago) who bragged she had robbed from us many times and was going to hit us again.  Over the past few years, we have found valuable pieces missing with no clue when or how they disappeared.  

One day a young couple was asking the price to have a pair of emerald earrings made.  Something didn't feel right but hubby couldn't put his finger on it.  The next day, they came in when I was there and asked about a few other things. I had no idea they were 'casing the joint.'

Day Three.  They came in and while the man kept my husband occupied, the woman stole several things, reaching into the cases and helping herself to the goodies.  It threw us both into an immediate depression.  Of course, these things never happen at a "good" time, but I was already in a low state and trying to stay afloat in the throes of very disturbing news from the previous month.  

After they left, hubby realized what had happened and I clearly heard it in his voice when he called me.  My heart was so heavy for him as we didn't need any more gloom and doom.

Then I remembered I had the man's phone number because the idiot thief gave it to me to call him when the earrings they ordered were ready.  

"Hi, is this Zack?"  I imagined he had not given me his real name -- but his real phone number! "Were you in our jewelry store earlier today to place an order?"

"YES!  Hi."

"Congratulations!  You were on Candid Camera!  If you would like to bring back the items you took from us in the next 30 minutes we will not take this to the next level." I had no idea what that next level would be but was compelled to inflict some kind of threat.  It is common knowledge around town that the cops do zip all - not just our own experience.

"It wasn't me.  It was HER." 

"Time is wasting.  I suggest you find her quickly - you have 28 minutes."

Of course, they didn't come in -- I knew that the items had already been transformed into drugs, but hopefully I sent a message.

That evening a drug dealer called us to let us know he had our stuff. We had been kind to him over the years and he wanted to return the goods to us.  Hubby met with him and it was watches and rings we were not even aware were missing.  They were lower end items than what they had robbed earlier that day.

Depression was getting deeper and many negative thoughts were running rampant. Trying to rise above it was a struggle but necessary.

Are you still with me?  It gets better.

The following day, one of the native carvers who has several of his pieces on display in our store popped in to chat.  Hubby told him what happened and watched the carver's face turn red and fire come into his eyes.

"I'll be right back."

Twenty minutes later he came back.  I could not post here what happened but suffice it to say, the thief won't be robbing from us again.  We were clueless.  This man took it upon himself to set things in order.

The carver also gave us the girl's picture and we will be posting it to all the businesses in our town as she has robbed many of them repeatedly.  The carver told us to rest well, he was bringin' in the cuzzins'. We'll leave it at that.  It is their business and they obviously have a need to make things right.

"You don't rob from good people.  They are our friends.  They help everybody.  We are watching you."  That's the message they are sending.

We have no idea what this all means except it is the best form of insurance we have had for a long time.

In the middle of gloom, a child brings a smile

Small children, especially babies, are oblivious to what is going on in the adult world.  They love unconditionally and only want to be loved back.  No matter what you may be going through, a child has the unique ability to put a smile on your face.

Here's my little Diva at 2.5 months old.

Her big brother dotes on her and wants to stay near her at all times. She giggles when she hears his voice or sees his face.  Nothing - ABSOLUTELY NOTHING - could be better than that.

   

photos courtesy konacoffeebeans.org,  orixinsurance.com, 4autoinsurancequote.com, jdmanufacturing.com, abc7chicago.com

Where is Your Focus When Life Throws You a Curve?

When calamity strikes, how do you cope?  Have you ever had to suffer the loss of everything you hold dear in this world?  After years of traumatic events in my life, I was constantly asked to "write a book" because as difficult as it was to believe, people would draw strength from it.

I did write the book and that is precisely what happened.  I firmly believe we need to share our stories to help others who may be experiencing a similar dilemma.  Hence, my talk show was born - interviewing ordinary people who went through extraordinary circumstances and remarkably survived.  They give us tips and coping skills in dealing with the curves life throws at you.

THEN....smack in the middle of one of the greatest pains in my life (read about it here) the fires in Fort McMurray started.  Around the world, people pulled together to support those who had to flee their homes. Many of them did not have a chance to retrieve their wallets, or heartbreaking to believe -- their pets.  That story is here.  That post was written in response to a prompt challenge in a blogging group.  

Imagine my surprise when the next challenge was to use words that tied in precisely with those fires.  A fellow blogger at Climaxed gave me the words honey ~ blowing ~ fort ~ fireplace ~ problematic ~ social anxiety.

I was not expecting to grieve so deeply for the people in Fort McMurray, but it was too close to home.  My daughter and her family recently moved from there and they have friends and family who work there.  This tragedy is far from over and will affect lives for a long while.  In light of the fact that the summer has not yet started, the world prays for rain, the blowing winds to cease, and cooler temperatures.

The social anxiety that comes with these disasters is often bittersweet.  The tragedy can be beyond coping but it draws families and communities together.  We learn very quickly what is important in our lives.  As difficult as it is to lose our possessions, we cherish the people in our lives on a deeper level.