How to Laugh in the Middle of a Crisis

Remember when life was this carefree?

I have been able to avoid using hand sanitizer for years. Now, in 2020, it is becoming mandatory. This is becoming more difficult when some stores and banks want to infect you with it before you enter their store. 

Entering the grocery store yesterday I forgot to bring my Basic H natural wipes with me while lining up and sure enough, they required me to have a shot of the sanitizer. Thinking quickly, I said, "Sorry, but I am allergic to most ingredients in hand sanitizer."

What I wanted to say was, "Over my screaming and kicking body will you put that on my skin."  

The doorman said, "No problem." He handed me a yucky wet cloth drenched in bleach. I thought I was going to throw up. What could I say now?  Without wanting to cause a scene, I barely touched the cloth while getting a lecture on how we all must do our part to stay safe. Biting my tongue I smiled and immediately texted my friend while walking into the store. I knew this would make her day. She laughed so hard we both peed a little. 

I will never forget my pure and safe wipes again. If you don't know why hand sanitizers are destroying our immune systems and it is only getting worse, click here. 

What's that smell?

I decided to bake chocolate chip cookies for the grands to take with me when I visit them next week. At the same time, I was making chicken curry. My question to you is this:  Do you have any idea how weird that combination of smells can be? It smells a lot like dirty feet. It didn't help that I burnt one of the papadums when heating them up for dinner.

"What's for dinner?" Hubby asked when he walked in the door. "Or maybe I shouldn't ask?"

It didn't take long to adjust to the weird combination of odors as the curry was fabulous and I hid the cookies. Out of sight......

Just like his Dad - this kid can fix anything

Crisis or Not.....We NEED to laugh for our Health

In my last post, I shared the sentiments of many of us who are just SOOOOOO tired of everything that is going on and hope it will all end soon. In the meantime, we need to surround ourselves with as much humor as we can. 

After six months of not seeing the grands .....I can hardly wait until next week.

But first.....Your Laugh for the Day:

When my kids were preteens, I installed an 800 toll-free line in our home. Back in the day when you needed a quarter to make a phone call, I was tired of listening to the excuse, "Sorry, mom, for not letting you know I was going to be home late, but I didn't have a quarter."

It cost six cents on my phone bill when they use the 800 line. NO MORE EXCUSES. "Mom, I'm going to be home an hour late. I'm at the mall with so-and-so." For six cents it gave this mom peace of mind and the kids never had a legitimate excuse for not calling. 

These many years later, we still have the same 800 line and use it for numerous reasons. Love it. However, the 800 number we received decades ago is one digit off from the number for a medical clinic in Washington and also a mobile phone service in Florida. 

This can be irritating when we get calls in the middle of the night. What shows up on the call display is the name of the state so I rarely answer it.

We used to get 15 or more calls a day but currently only one or two every few days. We have had a lot of fun with this over the years. Especially when the same person calls numerous times IN A ROW!

And Here's the Fun Part

Sometimes I answer in a different language and pretend I don't speak English. Other times I answer in a little kid's voice and pretend I don't know where my mommy is. This is extremely frustrating for the caller because they are totally confused.

I have had people swear at me because I wouldn't help them with their impending pharmaceutical order or cell phone issue. I usually hang up and they will call back numerous times until they figure out they misdialed.

My favorite one is when I answer the phone with a dignified tone, "Thank you for calling the International School for Morons, how may I direct your call?" SILENCE. NOTHING. I hang up.

When they call for the medical clinic I have had people get mad because I wouldn't take their order for a product. So.....I started taking credit card numbers and tell them their product is on the way. Wonder how long it took them to figure out they misdialed. Would you give someone your credit card number over the phone when you are PRECISELY told you have the wrong number?

International School of Morons, indeed.

But the one call I will never forget is on Christmas Day many years ago. We were in the middle of eating dinner when a call came in.  Our son-in-law asked if he could answer. The man on the opposite end of the call began to explain his problem with his cell phone. My SIL proceeded to take him through many steps to correct the problem. Of course, each step was ridiculous and wouldn't solve anything. He stayed on the phone for several minutes until the loud bouts of laughter coming from the rest of the family started to drown him out. Finally, he said, "Look, Buddy, I don't have a clue what I am talking about, but have a Merry Christmas!"

Staying Focused is our Choice

All of my friends, family, and associates know me well enough to know that I got through tremendous traumas in my life by having the right attitude, staying focused on the positive and laughing......a lot!  This time is no different.

We will get through this - we will be better for it. And we must realize that we have nothing to fear but fear itself.

This coming week we will travel to see our grandkids for the first time since Christmas. We are ecstatic. Kids change a lot in six months and I will embrace every moment with these little ones:

I have a feeling I'll be getting soaked with a water pistol

Each month I am part of a blogging group challenge called "Fly on the Wall." Bloggers share what's been going on in their homes. It is a great way to connect and stay in touch. We would love you to join in the fun. 

Here are this month's posts. I hope you enjoy them.

Baking In A Tornado    
             

Menopausal Mother     
             

Spatulas on Parade