Friday, July 17, 2015

10 Reasons to Skip Summer

Yes, I'm one of those inconsiderate people who likes the cold when everyone around me is freezing. Even in the winter time, I like my home cool.  The living room is the only room in the house that is heated. No matter how cold it is outside, we sleep with the windows open and the fan blowing.  No, I am not hot flashing - we just prefer living in cool temperatures.

My friends know that I don't own a winter jacket.  They offered to loan me one when I visited my daughter in the Arctic a couple years ago. I reluctantly took it with me for the trip, but I never zipped it closed – the temperature was a balmy MINUS 30 degrees. At that temperature, it doesn't matter if it is Fahrenheit or Celsius – your breath freezes in mid-air. Barely fazed me. Always been this way.




I grew up in Midwest USA.  Over 40 years ago the man I chose to spend the rest of my life with informed me he wanted to move to the West Coast.

“Don't believe what you read, it rarely rains in Seattle” he lied. Blinded by love, I believed him and helped to fulfill his desire to live and die near the ocean.

I realized very quickly that it rained a lot more than I had even imagined, but it didn't matter because the bonus to living here was the summers were cool. 


As the decades passed, there was a definite change happening with the weather. And to fulfill recent scientists' predictions, Northwest USA's weather is becoming more like a dessert. I am starting to get really angry about that. Now we do rain dances in hopes of triggering some moisture but it isn't happening.



The last two summers have been downright miserable – hot every day with little to no rain. We haven't had any real winter in three years. It stays mild and sunny most winter days. This year we have broken all heat records and it is only June. The temperatures for the past two weeks have been lingering around 80 to 90 plus. What's to like? The forecast – no change until the end of August. I wonder if I will survive.

“Don't you just love this heat?” If anyone else asks me that I might slap them. “No, I don't love it. I hate it. And I ask you what's to love?”

I think I have it figured out. Summertime is a time to enjoy the great outdoors. It is a time to relax, read a book while sunbathing, go swimming, camping, and hiking. None of those activities appeals to me or fit into my lifestyle.  There is little about summer that I like -- I warned you that I was inconsiderate.

Please hear me out -- and hopefully, some of you will agree with me.  Here are my reasons for not liking the summer heat:


NUMBER 10

The last time I got a tan, which was 40 years ago, I got sunstroke and now I stay white – milky white. My husband loves my silky skin that is not exposed to the blazing sun or chemical filled sunscreen.  He prefers it to me having a fainting spell when exposed to the summer sun.


NUMBER 9

I love to dress up and to wear layers. As soon as the temperature rises above 70 degrees, the clothes come off and that's not a pretty sight. Especially when you are milky white and kinda old.


NUMBER 8

Wearing a bra is NOT an option.


NUMBER 7

You can't drive with the windows down. I drive with the windows open in the winter time, but they must be closed -- breathing in that AC during the summer.


NUMBER 6

People have an excuse for being late. One of my pet peeves is “Sorry for not getting back to you sooner, we were on holiday.” Or even better “Sorry I forgot all about my commitment to you, it's summer – you know how it is.”

No, I most definitely do NOT know how it is – what happened to fulfilling an obligation? Lame excuses!


NUMBER 5

Anyone ever been pregnant in summer? I rest my case.


NUMBER 4
Little gets done. I am a Type A personality with OCD. Now before you laugh too hard or get ticked off – think about it. We are the type of people who work 24/7 taking on our own jobs and the jobs of those around us who have not completed theirs.

I feel ill when it is this hot and don't want to do anything. But I push myself harder and accomplish half as much as when it is cold outside. Even though for my personality type I have unusually low blood pressure, I am sure it rises when it is hot and my ire ascends with the temperature.


NUMBER 3

The heat wrecks havoc for our wildlife. They can't find water.


NUMBER 2

I love to cook. We eat a lot of hot, spicy foods requiring a lot of prep time. Who feels like doing that with water trickling down your face in front of a hot stove?


BUT MY PERSONAL NUMBER ONE REASON WHY I HATE THE HEAT:


Living in the rain forest when there is no rain is deadly. New forest fires spring up every day and it is extremely frightening not only for the devastation but for the communities of homes that are in the wooded areas.

The fragrant smell of summer is overcome with the smell of smoke; going outside requires you to wear a facial mask.  The evergreens that graced the mountainside are now a colorless shade of dirty brown.

A couple weeks ago a forest fire (triggered by someone throwing a cigarette butt while walking through the woods) started about a mile from our home. It still is not under control. Many people have been evacuated from their homes. The devastation is criminal and heartbreaking because many of our furry wildlife creatures have been killed.....need I go on? So sad. It is estimated that 30 new fires are starting daily and troops from all over the world have been deployed to help. There is not enough manpower, equipment or funds to get a handle on this state of emergency.

These two photos were taken outside our front door Sunday morning two weeks ago.  It was eerie.  My friend called me and wondered if the end of the world was nigh.  The air, the sky, the world was brown.





I'm so done.  I wonder what the Arctic summers are like.

Am I the only one who feels this way – anyone out there agree with me? Or do you have any more reasons to add to the list?


Photos courtesy of pinterest.com, cliffmass.blogspot.com, wisegeek.org, behavioradvisor.com, peaiatricsnow.com

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